Broken Tooth

Today HW's tooth fell! There was so much blood everywhere. He finally had a adult tooth! When my tooth fell off, there wasn't any blood at all. Why? The simple answer is... my tooth was dead. The difference between dead teeth and alive teeth is their colour. Alive and healthy teeth are either yellow ( if you do not brush your teeth ), white ( if you whitened it or brushed it everyday). Dead teeth are grey. There was once I put my dead tooth under my pillow and guess what? The grey tooth became a purple $2 note. Was it my mother who put it or the tooth fairy? Do you, reader, believe in the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, Jack Frost or the Tooth Fairy? Whether all these people exist or not, it is still a mystery. ( Except for the man in red and white suit that lives in Finland. )

Also, my EXAMS have started. I kind of hate exams. I love English, Mathematics and Science, but I hate Mother Tongue. Finally, this Monday is the finals of PESA. If you reader, think I misspelled PEAS as PESA, you're wrong. Kindly scroll down this web page and read about PESA and WHAT IT MEANS.

Sincerely,
George Ring

Protect The Trees

Today my snotty Health Ed teacher kept talking about protecting the enviorement, don't waste paper and other stuff and nonsense. Worst of all, she asked us to EAT VEGGIES! I will be harming the plants if I do that. I prefer eating flesh than fresh vegs!!! I hate string beans BLAH, BLAH.....

Relax, readers. The nonsense you have just read is by a Africa man who eats humans. I won't write things like that. I LOVE veggies. I like it! But even though I like eating vegetables, there are some people that eat just vegetables ( NO RICE ), and are super eco- green. They K-I-L-L people who waste paper and they shoot construction workers who kill trees to make condos. They even have a group name. Guess what is it. They specialise in saving trees and they respect trees! They are called the Fellowship and Ancient Rights of Trees. FARTers, in short. You don't believe me right? Then check out their website!
www.farters.com/FARTers/Earth/20%search.world
Doubting me still, right? In that case, go double check by asking a health nut: "Who are FARTers?"

Also, just SWALLOW the veggies when you eat them. Why? It is because I am a part- time mad scientist. When you swallow the vegetables, you will choke. When you choke, you will vomit. So I want you to observe what is the color of the puke. When you feel better, type the color of the sick into MY COMMENTS.

Remember, eat vegetables, not veg with table.
Shut down the computer NOW and beg with your mom to cook you vegetables.
Your writer with a grin on his face, not a green on the faece,
George Ring
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One Night Stay In Crowne Plaza @ Changi Airport

Welcome, my dear readers. Just yesterday, Singapore celebrated its 44th birthday. Singapore sure is quite "old". Now, everyone celebrated National Day differently. Some went shopping, some held parties in their HDB flats, condos, bungalows and in other places. Some went to the Marina Foating Bay to watch the NDP parade. But for me, I went to a hotel in Changi Airport to get a view of the fireworks. Some of the readers reading this may have gone to other hotels too to watch the parade and also not having to drive all the way to Marina. ( Recognize anyone? )

You see, I had gotten a free room on the 9th floor of Crowne Plaza @ Changi airport. And that is the tallest level. Normally, without any free rooms or discount tickets, the amount you must pay just to stay for a night will burn a hole in your pockets.

I could also hear the chimes during the Pledge Moment at 8:22. ( Why must it be 8:22, not 7:22 or 6:22? ) I saw the golden fireworks from the windows at the hotel room. Even though in Changi, the far away fireworks in Marina could still be seen. Too bad I had to check out at EXACTLY 12 am, 59 minutes and 58 seconds. I hope I would have the free room NEXT year.

Goodbye folks and my heart will forever be thumping up and my hand will be reaching down,
Your writer,

George Ring

Plain English Speaking Awards 2009

Just yesterday, I participated in the semi- finals of a competition called '' Plain English Speaking Awards '', which is PESA in short. When I say ' Plain English ', I do not mean the " plain " as in '' Plain Waffle ''. What Plain English means is using simple words that everyone will understand and it also means not using BIG words like '' philosophy '', '' aromatic '' and.... you get the idea. This competition is a storytelling competition, but not just saying any story but a story with simple words like ' big ' instead of ' GIGANTIC '. Last year, this competition was 22 years old. Now it's turned 23 years old. Last year when I was still a puny P2, I went to the competition too and lost during the preliminary rounds. Now this year, I managed to get into the semi- finals and just yesterday, I received news that I was a finalist, which also means that I went to the finals! ( What great achievement ! )

Another good thing is that - BURP - my teacher still owes me a McDonald's treat! She bet with me initially that if I went to the semi- finals, she would buy me a McDonald's meal. When I went to the semi, she said that she would buy me ANOTHER McDonald meal! She bought one value meal for me, but she stills owes me another meal! So dear teacher, if you are reading this, remember, next time bet with something else cheaper!

The FINALS are coming soon and I do hope I will win. Now, I'm signing off as I need to finish my unfinished fries and fish burger.

Until that, I'll always be your writer and eater,

GEORGE RING
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George Ring DARES you to send him one of your most terrifying accidents or most embarrassing toilet trip. Send your stories to MY COMMENTS and if you can, let George see your photos. We DARE you to tell your true stories. The most SCARY or FUNNY encounter will be published in George Ring's next post. Why don't you try?

The Menu Of Gross Food

The food in this menu can be ordered

OR Delivered. For more details, go to http://www.cookersmenu.com/

MEN U

Freshly baked chickant with goose intestines and crow's brain- $45.00++ Exsclusive of GST

Freshly roasted sow or pig with a special THANK YOU present that is a pig's head from the sharks- $$$$$$ FREE

Uncooked chicken egg with fertilizer on the spot. Goose feathers minced avalible too. - $56.99++

Holiday Trip To MALAYSIA

Hello…. I’m finally back from my holiday. Let me tell you about it. It’s ‘interesting’. Really! Trust me. Anyway, it was around 8 am when we departed. We had breakfast in McDonald’s and after we had our breakfast, we went to the Woodlands checkpoint. I do not like my new passport. My passport photo looks so…., well, that is another (boring) story.



And so began our journey to KL. Well, sorry, I was SLEEPING throughout the WHOLE journey and I only woke up when we reached the rest station. For lunch or luncheon, we went to KFC. After eating, we continued our journey and, shortly, we arrived at Holiday Inn. To me it was a short while because I was sleeping, again. We checked in at the hotel, and, once again, went to bed. Later during night time, we went to Sunway Pyramid Shopping Mall to, of course, shop.



The next day, I found myself in a bad hair day… We shouldn’t talk about that. Let us go faster…………….. We went to Sunway Lagoon. We were supposed to wear wristbands. First, we went wild with water. I sat on rubber float and went down a very long spiral waterslide. And it was totally covered. WM sat in front of me. I could feel, but I could not see. It was pitch dark, then….. SPLASH! End of the fun.



Later, after changing back to plain clothes, not a wet swimsuit, we went mad in the Cowboy’s Boots. I had to sit alone in a boot and buckle up. A man came to check whether we were buckled properly and then….. BEEP…… We went turning around. And then it went faster. So fast that I wanted to puke. Suddenly, the boots slow downed. Just when I thought it was time to go…. BEEP….. We were turning round and round again. When, finally, the boots really stopped, I felt so dizzy. Next, we went to the mini roller coaster. I sat alone, while WM sat with HW. Actually, I was not scared at all, but I don’t know why…. I just screamed. After all the fun activities, we went to the gift shop to exchange our wristbands for wristwatches. Actually, if you did not take the watch, you would get RM 10 back. But if you wanted a watch, you would not get your RM 10 back. And I think these China made watches only cost RM 1 each.


Last day in Holiday Inn….J, but….. not last day in Malaysia. We drove to Crowne Plaza and took a walk to the Aquarias the next day. What….. I know you may be searching the dictionary now or asking : What on Jupiter is Aquarias.ng the dictionary now or asking:???? I’ll explain…… It is the name of a place and it let’s you admire the beautiful sea creatures and some tropical animal for a fee, of course. At the entrance, there was a huge tank of MAN- EATING FISH,, Piranhas to be exact. Fall inside the tank, don’t even think a teenie weenie of getting out alive. Next, we went to the Aqua-Theatre to watch divers feed sharks and stingrays. He took a picture with me, too. For lunch, we went to Kenny Roger’s Roasters. I like the homemade muffins. And the chicken is the nicest. Later, we took a rest at the hotel, went for dinner and the next day was our last day in KL.

On the way back home, we stopped over at Malacca for lunch. I had a plate of chicken rice. It was not as nice as Singapore’s chicken rice. Actually, I wanted to have a McDonald’s chocolate sundae but the queue was too long. WM even tricked me into eating…. DURIAN chendol!!! I have always hated durian since young and now hate durian chendol even more.

We came back to Singapore on Sunday and on Friday, it was off to Malaysia again. This time, we went to Desaru. We first went to Kotatinggi waterfall to waddle in water. While walking on the steps, I felt something scaly. Still I continued walking. Then, WM yelled at me. I turned and saw a snake slithering away, its tongue so red! It was quite deep in the water and we had to step and hold onto the big rocks to move around. But the rocks were very slimy because of the algae. I nearly fell when trying to hold the rocks. Luckily WM carried me up. After all the swimming, I went to the loo\ toilet\ dunny\ washroom\WC\jerry\washroom\bathroom or whatever you call it, to wash up. Then, on our way to Desaru, we stopped for lunch at Jade Garden Restaurant located in Sungei Renggit. I like the lobster served there. The lobsters are so crispy that you can eat every part of the lobster, shell or meat.

Strange Mixtures : BEVERAGES

Have you drank a cup of plain water? Of course yes! But.......... Have you drank a cup of ketchup squeezed plain water with a mixture of salt and vinegar? Here are more strange mixtures. I dare you to try them ALL!

1. OOZY Mud Swamp- A glass of chocolate milk mixed with brown vinegar, along with some licorice. Squeeze some HERSHEYS chocolate fudge on top of it and - slurp - swallow it or drink it, whichever way you like. If you want, you may add aome blackcurrant juice.

2. CHILLY Spicy Gummy Bear- A cup of carrot juice mixed and blended with small chillies, squeezed with chilli sauce and at last, added with pounded YUPI bears.

3. MILO Doo- Doo- A normal jug of MILO dinosaur, but this time with an almond cake on top of it- POUNDED! Put some chocolate ice-cream and put tiny bits of durain for the foul smell. Smelly!


Well................ Wanna try?=)